My Profound Thoughts

It’s been a while now that anything exciting has happened. Life was just limited to work and home. No outings, no dine outs, no window shopping, no chill outs with friends, no moving at all. Since the lockdown life has come to a standby. It felt robotic, as though an external force controlled every movement, but the funny thing was it was just a virus.

Amelia was lost in thoughts, her mind drove back to an year ago. She was so excited this time of last year, as she was looking forward to buy her first car. A girl who was keenly waiting to her road to freedom. Though a bit reluctant to go straight to fast moving roads, she was just overwhelmed of her achievement. For her this has always been an unattainable dream in her mind due to fear of speedy vehicles. She couldn’t believe that an year has passed. She really wished to take the key and just drive through the countryside, just to enjoy the scenic beauty. She felt helpless, she was like a bird trapped in the nest. She knew this wasn’t ‘essential’ in the point of view of a lockdown.

Amelia is having a day off from work today. Her other half has already left to work. As much as she enjoyed the time spend with him, she indeed loved her lone time too. But this time it felt a bit weird for her. She kneeled on the couch, sat facing the window, gazing to the main road . She saw the cars parked in front of all the houses as far as she could see. She was amazed by the thought that how many people are stuck in these houses. Behind those walls there could be an elderly lady sitting helpless who is not able to get her essential supplies, a sad child who is not able to go to school and see his friends, an adult who is frustrated not being able to go to work to provide for his family and even a key worker who is on isolation due to having symptoms of the virus. This thought made her heart ache.

She woke up by the phone bell, as she grabbed the phone, she saw this familiar name of her friend. Amelia was shaken by the news she heard. She heard about the death of this young boy after contracting the virus. The boy next door to her friend, who lived with his family. She was extremely saddened about the thought of him taken away from his family, and not been able to bid final good bye before he left the world. It made her so emotional, the thought of dying without the loved ones froze her heart. What if he deeply wished to see them before he closed his eyes, what if he felt scared to let go of his body, what if he only wished to say how much he loved them.. Amelia’s whole body was trembling. She thought what if she would have to face death before she is ready for it. She sighed deeply. God how could life be merciless.

She glanced on the clock in her lounge. It is just after 11:00 in the morning. The sun shine has brushed through the blinds, her living room looks lively and bright. She thought of making lunch. Her friend has already given her the recipe of creamy chicken and mushroom pasta. She was so keen to make this Italian recipe for the first time. Amelia loved to experiment with food. She gathered the ingredients. And followed the steps as directed by her friend in her text message.

Even though she was focussing on her task, she peeked through the window to her back garden. The lawn really needed to be attended, the arrival of spring was very much evident. She saw these two pigeons rubbing their beaks together. The nature is just prospering itself. Nothing seemed to have affected it. Eventually, Amelia washed the dishes as she finished cooking.

After daily chores, she paused for a while. She realised that it was not just her body that was trapped behind doors,but also her mind too as she kept losing herself in her thoughts and worries. She was flabbergasted by the thought that this is how it feels about staying home for just one day. How about those people who have to stay indoors for several days. Amelia said to herself “Liberty is indeed a great feeling, you only know it once you are deprived of it”. She wanted a release. She came to the living room and lighted a candle in front of the sacred heart picture of Jesus and kneeled down with a heavy heart. Her lips moved in a personal conversation with the creator of the world. She didn’t have no complains this time, but only a prayer to save the world. She knew this virus was nothing in His eyes. She knew He couldn’t put His people to be destroyed. She knew there is nothing impossible for her Heavenly Father. She knew no hair will fall off her head without His notice. She knew He would only let these trials bend you, but not break you. She prayed if it was His will for His people to live through this, then Let His people be strengthened enough to walk this path. Her soul felt enlightened and she looked above. This time she was full of hope, A hope for a new tomorrow.

NB: No doubt this lockdown is essential at the present arising situation. But as a coin has two sides, while being too focussed on the physical well-being that we stick to the lockdown measures, we need not forget the effects it poses to the mental well-being of a person .. Eagerly waiting for the day we be able to maintain our balance..May God bless the World..

(Just a thought !!)

~ Chinchu Gibu